Max knew the dope was killing him. Why wasn’t he dead already? The grit in his eyes hurt like hell, as did his hair–both roots and follicles. Something smelled bad.
Wiki-Commons Sad Girl
A ticking clock drove him insane. He couldn’t move. Margie’s voice, warm as honey, penetrated his brain, “Don’t leave me a complete orphan, will you?”Margie, I wish I could be strong like you want, but it’s too late.
A mind-killing jangling interrupted his thoughts. I’m surely dying now.
The answering machine clicked on. “Max, are you there? This is Margie. Where have you been all week? Call me. Please.”
Max tried to sit up. He saw blood on his chest—lots of it. Was he dead already?
His mouth tasted ashes.
Ashes was inspired by M3 Flash Fiction challenge. You MUST check it out and play!
The word limit for ashes is 125 words; this post is 123 words.
This is great. You could expand this into a terrific story…so talented.
I’m blushing but I’m pleased you like this story Patricia. Thank you.
Wow! That was an awesome story. I wanna play too!
Thank you, Susan. Come on along!
The more the merrier, Susan. Thank you.
Awesome! I love it! Linking now
Red.
xxx
YOU’RE awesome but I thank you.
Thank YOU, Red on both counts.
Amazing piece. …..and I want more! Excellent writing, Tess. Thinking of expanding on it?
I might see my way to it. I’ll have to give it a look-see. Thanks for commenting, Judy.
Oh my goodness Tess you surely aren’t going to leave it there? Come on turn this into a full length story for your fans please!
Hmm. That’s a thought. Thanks Gilly.
Wow, really powerful, it grabs you and runs!
Thanks, Vanessa. Sometimes I get lucky. I have fun playing.
Oh wow!
Brilliant story Tess!
Thank you, Ghia. Glad you like it.
I’m really impressed by your ability to make a story with so few words. It’s something I, with my tendency to ramble, could never do! Good work, Tess.
Thanks, Laurie. I like playing and I can’t ramble because my vocaabulary is limited. Tee hee.
Love that story. That’ll teach him to be a dope head!
That’s for sure! Thanks for dropping by, Rose.
Scary things must happen when your mind isn’t present, I’m sure. Thanks for coming by, Rose.
Powerful stuff, Tess. You are great at creating tension!
Thanks, Naomi. It’s nice to hear when something’s working.