It seems the gods are not on the same page as I am / we are. I’ve been cooking and preparing for a week for tonight’s traditional Christmas Eve feast. It’s not because I’m the first born that I’ve tried to squeeze in as much of the past into our new present. I like to think I’ve cooked like crazy trying to fill a void.
My potluck contribution was to have been two kinds of perioges and my mom’s updated version of cabbage rolls that have overgone many revisions over the years. I’d had no idea of the latest version till I checked the cookbook we published for mom’s 75th birthday. It contained mom’s secret recipes as well as a number of favourites we siblings had brought into the family.
Alas, my youngest granddaughter got the flu in the wee hours this morning. Because I had been hugging and kissing her around supper time last night and the fact that we all live at such close quarters, a decision had to be made. My son-in-law has a village of relatives with whom we come in contact at all special occasions—Christmas Day being one of them. A number of his relatives are elderly and a number are very young. In order not to spread germs to these two vulnerable groups, we cancelled Christmas. Pretty much. We decided it was kinder if we didn’t spread germs but not happily or easily.
This means, all my cooking and planning etc. has gone down the tubes. For the first time in my LIFE, the whole family has not been together on Christmas Eve. It feels awkward and strange. I am in an in-between-world tonight: neither Christmas Eve nor NOT Christmas Eve.
What I’ve learned today is that sometimes things really do change. They did last year at this time and then again today. I wonder who is really responsible for what’s been happening. I am not a superstitious person but then again, that’s not what this is about. Everything has changed beyond our control and we’ve had to adjust, just like everything in life that sometimes is not as obvious.
Regardless, A GIANT Merry Christmas to all!