How the Cookie Crumbles

An irreverant view of life after SIXTY-FIVE

Flash in the Pan – Progress

21 Comments


“This is crazy.” Mandy heaved a sluggish sigh and clamped her lips tight, her hands stuck clenched in her lap. She peered across the table through thick mascaraed lashes. You’re still too handsome, and forty-four is young yet…

“Is that all you have to say, Tony? You’re tired?”

Dull blue eyes avoided hers; he thrust out his chin. “No more.”

“And me? Don’t you care about me?”

Tony looked away, his shoulders sagged.

“You’ve made no effort and no progress for two weeks.”

“Go home.” His voice grew hoarse

Stubborn tears blinded her. “Try for me, and you can walk again…”

~ * ~

The word limit for Progress is 100 words. I used all of them. For the rules and to join, check out: http://mommasmoneymatters.com/flash-fiction/

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Author: Let's CUT the Crap!

I'm getting a little LONG in the tooth and have things to say about---ouch---AGEing. I believe it's certainly a state of mind but sometimes it's nice to hear that you're NORMAL. I enjoy reading by the truckload. I'm a grandma but I don't feel OLD although I'm not so young anymore. My plan is to stick it out as long as I can on this lovely planet and only will leave it kicking and screaming!

21 thoughts on “Flash in the Pan – Progress

  1. 😦 How do you evoke such emotion and tell such a story in 100 words?

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  2. Wow, intense. I want to know what’s going to happen. 😉

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  3. I admire the art of brevity and your ability to adhere to it! Wonderful story, Ms. Tess.

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  4. Tess, the tunnel of just these two people is so well done.

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  5. Whew this is very tense. A powerful topic to take on, very well done.

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  6. Very well done Tess.

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  7. reminds me of the lady who apparently thinks she belongs in a wheelchair even though she can walk!

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  8. This was very good Tess. Loved how you drew to the end

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  9. Pingback: Flash in the Pan – Progress | Joe's Musings

  10. Tragic.

    I’m not sure about the “ice-blue eyes…” It’s a great phrase, and to me it suggests a lot of control, a dynamic attitude. Tony seems to have given up, withdrawn, be on the defensive – I feel that doesn’t quite gel.

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  11. That was incredible. Never saw that ending coming. Nicely done!

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  12. Wow, such strength in so few words… I had to read it twice to make sure i took it all in!

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  13. Very intense. I like this one. I do think Delft has a point. I wanted him not to be the quitter after “ice-blue”.
    xxx

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Some things in life are complicated. Let's keep it simple.

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