“I said STOP.”
Cody twisted around. A rifle barrel pointed level to his head shut his mouth. Lips pressed tight, he waited, breathless. Tense arms shot up.
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“You the surveyin’ man?”
Cody’s face stung. “No-pe.”
“Whatcha want then?”
“Hunting and fishing. Got lost.”
Moth-eaten hat man squinted, spewed coal-black tobacco. “Don’t see no rifle.” The click of the hammer masked birdsong.
“Walking. Nice morning.”
“Uh-huh. Git. Watch out fur them snakes.”
Head bent, Cody smirked.
~ * ~
This is the new Fall Quarter of Flash in the Pan. The theme is Disturbed.
The word limit for Level is 75 words. I used them all.
Click: http://mommasmoneymatters.com/flash-fiction/ to check out the rules and how to join.
How the Cookie Crumbles 
November 5, 2013 at 7:17 pm
WHY DID HE SMIRK!!!!! (Sorry, I don’t trust smirks)
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November 5, 2013 at 9:32 pm
I don’t trust smirks either. They’re always hiding something. My take is he lied and didn’t get shot. Huh.
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November 6, 2013 at 5:59 am
I thought that, but then I also thought something worse. He needs to take his smirk and go. Hmph.
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November 6, 2013 at 7:37 pm
..unless the snakes show up. Bwahaha.
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November 6, 2013 at 8:12 pm
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! 🙂
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November 5, 2013 at 8:35 pm
“A rifle barrel pointed level to his head shut his mouth.”—Yep. That would shut my mouth, too. 😉
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November 5, 2013 at 9:29 pm
Ack. I would faint straight away. ;-(
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November 5, 2013 at 8:53 pm
Really good Tess! Enjoy your writing so much! 🙂
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November 5, 2013 at 9:28 pm
Thank you kindly, Paulette. These challenges keep me upping the ante–I hope. 😉
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November 6, 2013 at 12:45 am
Another good one!
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November 6, 2013 at 7:39 pm
Thank you, kind sir. I’m pleased you like this one.
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November 6, 2013 at 1:41 am
A couple of good characters here Tess, you could use them again 🙂
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November 6, 2013 at 7:39 pm
Thank YOU, Gilly. I’m pleased you see more.
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November 6, 2013 at 3:44 am
I love it 🙂 fabulous writing!
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November 6, 2013 at 7:38 pm
I’m tickled you like it. Thanks so much.
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November 6, 2013 at 8:15 am
I love your writing Tess. This really got me thinking, such a great story in so few words. I can see these two characters in my mind even now and all kinds of scenarios exploding in my mind!
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November 6, 2013 at 7:37 pm
Wow. Thank YOU, Sherri. You are most generous. 😉
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November 6, 2013 at 8:28 am
Smirk? What was he up to? Good one Tess.
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November 6, 2013 at 7:36 pm
Thanks so much, Valentine. 😉
Cody did smirk but did he listen to rifleman warn him about the snakes?
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November 6, 2013 at 12:32 pm
You got me. Great characterization. Now, shake it up and make it a Wall Street hedge fund manager, or a mother of three. I’m trying to think outside the box here.
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November 6, 2013 at 7:26 pm
Thank you.
You are a real Drill Sergeant. 😉
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November 6, 2013 at 7:34 pm
I have two children in the military. It’s rubbing off.
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November 6, 2013 at 7:41 pm
You’re sweet and funny. Nice talking with you.
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November 6, 2013 at 4:01 pm
That Cody’s hiding something if you ask me, Tess. I could see it from the very beginning!
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November 6, 2013 at 7:14 pm
He’s a great liar too but I wonder what rifleman meant when he let him go so easily. “Watch out for them there snakes.” Bwahaha
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November 8, 2013 at 5:49 am
You need to write a book! With your capability and humor it would be a good one!
–Tressa
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November 9, 2013 at 2:55 pm
Sigh. Working on it. You make me smile. Thank you for the pick-me-up.;-)
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November 12, 2013 at 2:35 pm
You’re working on a book? Self publishing, or…submitting to a publisher, mm? What’ll it be, a collection of your flash fictions, or something else? Just curious.
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November 12, 2013 at 5:29 pm
Nice to see YOU! Glad you’re back. I feel we should share some wine.
The flash fiction is published by Red (5 anthologies). Have you checked out her blog? http://mommasmoneymatters.com/
I did a NaNo in 2012 and it’s kind of in limbo. I should concentrate on one thing only but blogging takes up all my time.
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November 9, 2013 at 4:04 am
Now snakes would put me right off a walk!
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November 9, 2013 at 2:16 pm
Yep. Me too. May Rifleman figured shooting wasn’t as much as watching him squirm or he know something…
Thank you for commenting Delft. Always nice to hear from you. 😉
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November 12, 2013 at 2:31 pm
I think they both need to watch out…and the old guy needs to install a better security system, guard dogs, a fence or something to keep trespassers out. Definitely think Cody’s up to no good. The old guy could be too. Maybe he set some traps further along the way on his land for trespassers like Cody to stumble on. Who knows.
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November 12, 2013 at 5:29 pm
Yes, yes, and yes. All of the above. What do you think about the reference to snakes? 😉
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