How the Cookie Crumbles

Life and scribbles on the far side of SIXTY-FIVE

Flash in the Pan – Mental

21 Comments


“When’s the last time you saw her?”

“Hmm… ‘bout two months…I s’pose.”

“She’s your wife. Don’t you know…?”

“Kat pulled this trick plenty of times before.”

O’Brien gazed forward and nodded towards his partner behind the double-sided mirror. Shuffling the papers on the table, he nodded. “I see—you stopped worrying after too many disappointments.”

“Yeah. You know. I gave up. She’s mental, you know…”

That a medical term?” The detective peered up beneath his lashes.

“No doc told me nothing. She was messed up see…”

hanging lightbulb“Was?”

“Was…was—the last time I…”

“You kill her?”

“No way Jose. Do I look like a murderer?”

“What’s a murderer look like? Go on then, but don’t leave town.”

Cluckie checked the mirror, smoothed his black hair, and wiped his mechanic’s hands on his work-pants. In a flash, he was gone.

* * *

Newspaper headlines the next morning: Missing wife found, accused of shooting husband.

~ * ~

This is the new Fall Quarter of Flash in the Pan. The theme is Disturbed.

The word limit for Mental is 150 words. I used them all.

Check how to join:  http://mommasmoneymatters.com/flash-fiction/

Author: Let's CUT the Crap!

I'm getting a little LONG in the tooth and have things to say about---ouch---AGEing. I believe it's certainly a state of mind but sometimes it's nice to hear that you're NORMAL. I enjoy reading by the truckload. I'm a grandma but I don't feel OLD although I'm not so young anymore. My plan is to stick it out as long as I can on this lovely planet and only will leave it kicking and screaming!

21 thoughts on “Flash in the Pan – Mental

  1. Oops! Didn’t expect that.

    Poor guy, seems pretty clueless where his wife is concerned. But that doesn’t usually get you shot…

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  2. Nice little twist,, 😉

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  3. Nice twist at the end. 🙂

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  4. Well….I didn’t see THAT coming! Well done!

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  5. I concur, wonderful twist, didn’t see that coming! You come up with the best names Tess, they fit the characters so perfectly. I’m stunned that you tell such a gripping story in so few words. I know I sound like a broken record as I keep saying this but I really mean it!!

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  6. Ooh, great twist. Did not see that coming! Nor did the husband, I suspect…

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  7. Tess, conversation is your metier. A rare gift. Very, very good.

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  8. another one with a twist ~ love your dialogue Tess – well done 🙂 x

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  9. Hahaha I didn’t notice the last sentence the first time around!

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  10. Brilliant! You sure can write!

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  11. Love this one! Love the twist, never saw it coming.

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  12. I agree with all the above comments. You write so well that I get engrossed in the story, I am in there with all the characters then I love the way I am left at the end with that…OMG factor with the twist. You are a gem of a writer.

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  13. Me neither! I mean, I didn’t see it coming either – I thought he’d skipped.

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  14. Good one, Tess! You never know what is gonna happen!

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