Heaven, Hell and Purgatory

January 3, 2014 by Let's CUT the Crap! 103 Comments

I’m slow at the gate, but eventually  I’ll jump in with both feet.

In August I threw my hands up and decided I was worth a Samsung Galaxy Ace II, a student school special no less. I’ve seen the bright and colourful icons on the new phones and felt left behind. Time to upgrade, and I did with a vengeance. The truth is my current tiny cell with a nub for an antenna wasn’t broken but I needed to keep up with new technology not hide behind the old. I have no-one to call, except in an emergency. I have a land line and it rings only on rare occasions. So what? I refused a plan with all the bells and whistles and finagled a 365-day pay-as-you-go-card. Don’t laugh. Finally I’m 21^st century-ready if I’m in a spot. If I need to call anyone while away from home.

Whoosh forward four months. Christmas and New Years have come and gone. My older (almost ten year old) granddaughter has graduated from an iPod to an iPad Mini this year. The six-year-old has a tablet. What a waste of money on the one hand, but on the other I know they must keep up with the times.

Apple, iPad Mini

“Babcia, everything’s so easy. All you have to do is this and then run your finger across or pretend pinch…” Happy to show me how her iPad worked, she prattled on while my eyes glazed over and my brain turned to thick dehydrated porridge. She gave me that look—that I-knew-you’re-too-too—a smirk.

“Excuse me. I need to visit the lady’s.” I moseyed down the hall, shut the door, paced, and flushed the toilet for good measure. I splashed water on my face, threw my shoulder back and marched back down the hall. By then the girls were into something else in the dining-room.

I popped open my laptop and Googled one computer store after another: Boxing Week Sales were everywhere for iPad Minis. Huh. Used to be specials might be secured on Boxing Day if the supply didn’t run out.

I raised my voice. “I need to go downstairs for another coffee. Be right back.” Nobody noticed my departure.

A new coffee as cover and my Visa card in my pocket, I raced back to my laptop. The day was Monday, December 30^th, the afternoon before New Year’s Eve. Time: about 2:00 PM. My fingers raced over the keyboard before stock ran out. I hummed with excitement from head to toe. I didn’t expect my package till after New Year’s Day.

The following morning, my inbox showed confirmation of my purchase plus a tracking number. Regular ground delivery expected: December 31^st. Not possible but I couldn’t help tracking all morning. At 11:31 AM the package had been delivered to my neighbourhood mailbox. How does this work? I’m impressed.

Miss. H. wore a Cheshire smile when I told her the news. “I can set it up for you.”

I had to input my e-mail address, then an alternate e-mail, then my life history. “Stop.”

Everything works except for a teeny snag. My security e-mail doesn’t like my password now and I can’t shop at the Apple store yet. I’m anxious to setup my PC Kindle books on my iPad Mini. If I must use electronic means to read e-books let me at least do it from the comfort of my Easy Boy.

Like I said. Slow at the gate but I’m moving forward–somewhat.  Halleluja!