How the Cookie Crumbles

An irreverant view of life after SIXTY-FIVE

These Socks Suck

120 Comments


I like new ideas. These days what you know today is old news tomorrow. Someone somewhere dreams up invaluable and imaginative ways of making money. Time and again I’ve been bamboozled into parting with my hard-earned cash on near worthless product(s). When the darn thing breaks or falls apart, I don’t beat myself up about it because the investment is never large to cause true grief. Life is supposed to be an adventure. No? Sure it is.

Last minute Christmas shopping found me at Walmart in the Pet Department. Lady Gaga doesn’t know or care about Santa, but she would get a treat anyway. I bought her a cart load of Iams canned chicken, beef, and lamb paté. Her favourites. She only gets on heaping teaspoonful in the morning with a quarter cup of dry Iams and at night she has dry cat food only. One can lasts five days: five spoons.

On my way back to pay for all the goodies in my basket, I passed a sock display. Wild and jazzy colours; soft and fuzzy yarn.

Wait a minute. What’s this? The advertisement said the socks had aloe in them or were aloe? Can’t recall. Only hand-washing was recommended. Their softness sold me in three seconds. In winter as in summer, I suffer from callouses on my heels. At three dollars a pair, I almost threw three packages into my cart. Something stopped me.

The first time I wore the socks, I expected magic: soft feet overnight. And yes, I wore them to bed. Canada’s winters are cold; freezing this year. Sigh. No miracle occurred that night or the next no matter how velvety they were to the touch.

For washing, I threw them, inside out, into lukewarm water with a little dish soap. Thick fibres drifted to the top. Awful stuff. Scooping the fuzz balls out, I changed the water and started over again. Why did they shed and where was all that wool coming from? Would my socks disintegrate in the wash?

With care, I squeezed out all the water instead of wringing them out and hung them over the shower to dry.

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The next couple of times I wore these strange foot warmers, fluff followed me everywhere: between my bed sheets, on the floor beside the bed, on the bathroom floor. At each washing, I expected a mass of fibres in my hands with nothing holding them together.

How many wearings or washings will they last? This latest adventure may be small but it’s not over yet. All for three measly bucks and no soft skin as anticipated. I wonder if I shouldn’t have put aloe and some O.V.O.O. on my heels before putting the socks on.

~ * ~

You want magic. I’m here to share it with you.  Use a Ped Egg on your heels–dry (the surface is like a rasp). The shower routine with the stone doesn’t work for me. Slather your feet with Vaseline. Put a plastic bag on each foot with a sock over each (cotton is good but not necessary) to hold it all together. Go to bed. In the morning your feet will be soft as a baby’s you-know-what. Honest.

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Author: Let's CUT the Crap!

I'm getting a little LONG in the tooth and have things to say about---ouch---AGEing. I believe it's certainly a state of mind but sometimes it's nice to hear that you're NORMAL. I enjoy reading by the truckload. I'm a grandma but I don't feel OLD although I'm not so young anymore. My plan is to stick it out as long as I can on this lovely planet and only will leave it kicking and screaming!

120 thoughts on “These Socks Suck

  1. They have aloe in them AFTER you rub aloe on your feet. Sheesh-don’t you folks up there read the directions? If you put aloe and Vicks on your feet and a drop of olive oil from Sicily in each ear the fibers will not disintegrate from the socks when you wash them. The socks will also last about 40% longer when you wear a green cap on your head and stand on one foot. Well at least the sock on the foot you are not standing on will last longer. So rotate. Or you could just move to Florida and go barefoot all the time.

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  2. Do they keep your feet warm? They may not last, but three dollars worth of warmth on a cold night might not be a bad investment.

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  3. My son bought me two pairs of socks for my birthday. Sounds like a weird gift, but they’re amazing. He got them from some sporting store, and they’re so thick and soft I feel like I’m walking on plush carpeting where there is none. And no fluff shedding either. Guess Walmart might want to look into those… 😉

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  4. I was about to comment then got sucked in to Carl’s and your replay to his. Made me laugh into choking. Thankfully, you only bought one pair, or a half of a pair, or perhaps a few fibers when it comes down to it. Moving to Florida is definitely the solution. Now, to talk your family into applying for jobs down there. 😉 Have a good weekend.

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  5. This is $3 worth of priceless laughter!!! Thanks. I actually have a pair of these – from a specialty store and they smell like vanilla, have aloe IN them and are still awesome after 3+ years. No fuzzies or yuck. Because of my exercise routine, my feet get beat up. Best advice I have is Vitamin E capsules! Puncture 1 for each foot and wear cotton socks to bed. Will keep feet warm and oily and you wake up with lovely tootsies. Hilarious story. Also love “Lady Gaga” as pet name. Since I LOVE her as an artist. 😉

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    • Thanks. Lady Gaga stands up to her name but she IS loveable.
      I will try the Vitamin E capsules. New to me.
      I get best results by using a Ped Egg and then slathering my feet with vaseline, putting both feet into separate plastic bags with socks over top to keep on the plastic. In the morning, feet are better than what you get when you pay $$ for a pedicure.

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  6. Just hang out on the beach with me…the sand keeps everything smooth!

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  7. I don’t know what to say about all this talk on socks. I haven’t worn any for years!!

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  8. My feet thank you for the tips. I wouldn’t mind trying out the tip of hanging out on the beach to let the sand work on the feet. I’m up for that!

    I can’t sleep with socks on. I can barely make it through my work day with socks on!

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  9. I love my fuzzy socks. But they are plain ole fuzzy socks no aloe in em and I wash them in the washing machine.

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  10. A great story for a three buck investment.

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  11. Maybe the ad meant to say that for the socks to work you had to buy the $20 bottle of super-special aloe vera to go with them, hence the cheap socks, but failed to mention this? These days, I don’t trust any advertising.
    Oh Tess, this did make me smile, but I hope that when all’s said and done your feet are keeping nice and warm, despite the loss of all that fuzz?? 😉

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  12. Since you bought these in WalMart, I assume they were made in China. Maybe ‘aloe’ is Chinese for ‘very poor quality wool that shreds in water’.

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  13. I was wondering about those socks. I saw a commercial for them. I won’t look any further for them. They’re not something I want now that I know about your experience with them. I’ll try your other method instead.

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    • Great. Saving money is GOOD.
      I gave myself a treatment after posting and my feet—are lovely. Why don’t I do this on a regular basis instead of putting it off all the time? Sigh.

      Try it. You’ll be surprised. The plastic bags sound weird but they works. You might want to tie them around your ankle–not too tight–because they tend to slip as you turn in your sleep.

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  14. I’m with Carl except it’s been cold in Florida too!

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  15. What a mess and how annoying for you! I use shea butter on my feet and keep a skanky pair of socks for the purpose.

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    • I’ve tried peppermint ointment for callouses and all kinds of stuff. This trick works best for me and lasts with Vaseline a couple of times a week with old sock (no plastic). Gave myself a treatment after the post last night. I should take the time out to do this more often. 😀

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  16. Okay, so you and I and countless others get roped into these things. I can’t stand things on my feet, except for shoes – always been like that. I sleep with my feet outside the covers, even on the coldest nights. Years ago I stopped wearing socks, even on the coldest nastiest days. My mom once commented – My daughter’s gone Miami Vice. She and Don Johnson are anti-socks. Your feet and callouses – I know those cuddly-wuddly socks feel good but like you say, they suck. Get yourself some cheap stretchy cotton (usually men’s) socks. Now….get yourself some petroleum jelly. I like to use the baby pet.jelly because it smells sorta like baby stuff. If you aren’t diabetic and don’t have podiatral circulation issues, use several emery boards to start smoothing down those callouses. These aren’t as hard on your feet and are more flexible than pumice stones. Emery them down good but be careful not to do too much. Now, before you go to bed, rub your feetsies with the Vaseline really good. Overdo it some. Put on the cheap stretchy socks and go to bed. do this for a few days and throw the socks in the wash. It will take a couple of weeks but keep it up. After you get them all nice and soft, do it once a week. Or, treat yourself to a nice pedicure and let them do away with the gunky foot stuff. But do the socks and the Vaseline. Your feet will get sock and the socks will keep your feet warm. Date: Sat, 11 Jan 2014 00:08:23 +0000 To: thspencer51@hotmail.com

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  17. It’s true–over and over that happens. I can’t believe the difference. Lucky for me, my feet are too big for ‘standard’ socks so I have just a few places to puy them (and they get wider with age).

    Good lint about the feet softener.

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    • This trick works. Just did it last night after my post. In a couple of days, I’ll just slather some more petroleum jelly on and pull on a pair of old socks (no plastic this time).
      I know about the widening. Yeah. Can’t shop at Payless…

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  18. For feet….Amlactin lotion daily….$18 miracle

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  19. Fun post. I love cozy socks too. I never expect them to soften my feet, but if I found a pair that did I would love it. Making feet soft is a job here in Arizona because the water is so hard. Maybe we’d both do well to get water softeners.

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  20. hmm.. wondering now about the pair of socks that claim the same I received as a gift. I haven’t worn them yet. I always love your adventurous nature Tess.
    On your foot treatment I can attest to it really does work.
    As I really do go barefoot even in the winter at home I needed to find a way to keep my soles soft too.
    I do the exact same thing as you, once a week. I do use a product called Aquaphor which is just petroleum jelly like Vaseline but without the same ‘fragrance’.. 😉
    Really this is a fun post that I love that you shared.

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  21. I am going to try your vaseline tip, Tess. also bought a pair of socks which promised me softer feet, but you can just guess. 🙂

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  22. Love fluffy socks, hmm don’t know how they would incorporate aloe in though especially after washes , but the Vaseline and socks work 🙂 oh while I’m at advice giving if you have a bad cold put Vicks vapour rub on your feet socks on, then in bed, feel better 🙂 x

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    • My MOM used to do that too…Vicks vapour rub on the feet…or was it garlic on the chest. Just kidding.

      It sounded like the Aloe was worked into the yarn somehow, that’s why a gentle wash was recommended. It still sounds hokey to me. 😀

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  23. I love nice warm socks. I’ve had those little throw blankets that leave tons of the fluffy fuzz balls all over the house before (and when you wash a ton comes out). They drive me crazy so i try not to buy them anymore if I can tell they’re the kind that do that. 🙂

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  24. Tess, those socks look like everything I own after I do laundry. My kids try to keep me away from the machines and do not allow me within ten feet of the bleach bottle. Shrinking is my particular forte. Just send me your socks and I’ll fix ’em forever!!

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  25. I’ve seen those! Too funny. I would have bought them too if I wasn’t rushing out the store. On the foot front, there are socks you can buy from shoppers which let you lube up your feet and let `em stew overnight. they have this kind of rubbery interior that keeps the goop in. 🙂

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    • Thanks, Karen. Didn’t know there was a market for such a product. I’ll stick to my roll of see-through plastic bags that are just the right width for my foot length. Might as well use them all up. However, good to know as I can pass along Shoppers product to others. ;-P

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  26. You had me at soft and fuzzy socks! And they you lost me with the fluff shedding. Sigh. Don’t these people test their products properly?!

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  27. I love fluffy socks…that don’t fall apart and I can throw in the washer. I would have tossed these three dollar socks in the washer to see what they were made of. If the machine don’t wash it, I don’t wear it.

    I’ll have to try the Vaseline, paper bag and sock treatment on my feet. I used to do something similar with my hands with I had bad eczema: Vaseline and gauze. It works wonders.

    Thanks for the post.

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  28. I had a similar experience with a knock off Snuggly. I found red fuzz balls for months after it laid to rest in the local landfill.
    I too suffer from year around callouses from my treadmill usage. My best remedy is gobs of Vaseline, men’s socks and sleep.

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    • Thank you for joining the conversation. This has become much more interesting than might have imagined. I was ticked and whined to the world. 😀

      I Well, glad we’re on same page. I must make more time and give myself these treatments on a more regular basis. 🙂

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  29. Tess – I’m with you. When I buy something, I want it to work.

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  30. Aloe socks, hmmm to have enough aloe in them, wouldn’t they have to be rally slippery?

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  31. Oh no! They sounded so promising and I would have tried them. Will need to get a ped egg and try your method instead.

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  32. Lol Tess, glad you finally realized the best remedy. Those socks are so bogus, sorry you fell prey, but on the bright side, they are bright and colourful, lol. 🙂

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  33. Lol. As annoying as the socks may be, they do look warm and cozy.

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  34. I had a pair of aloe socks. Forgot and threw them in the wash. I dab a bit of lotion in the Vaseline and yes, finally soft feet!

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  35. My daughter in law made me some scented sugar scrub for Christmas. It’s basically a misture of olive oil, sugar and scented essential oil – Mango Pear – it’s yummy and softens feet and hands like magic. (Now I sound like an infomercial) In fact it smelled so good I actually had to taste a little. Blecch! Definitely not a good idea.

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  36. Talk about a sock meltdown, I hate when that happens. 😦

    I actually have knit socks from yarn that apparently has aloe added to it. Mainly to make it nicer to knit with though I think. 😉

    Do you knit Tess? Maybe time to break out the needles and make some special socks, just for you!

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  37. But aren’t your feet slippery? Vasaline is so hard to get off.

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  38. funny, really that is funny. The call this an endcap. It is intended to get you to buy them, the store gets a kickback from the manufacturer for every purchase.

    Wash them, over and over again. Wash them till they stop shedding. Maybe they will keep your feet warm. Your advice is perfect.

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    • Ha ha ha. I can’t believe the mileage I’ve received from this post. I DO intend to keep washing the darn things until they fall apart because I want to see what it will take for their demise. Research you know. 🙂 😀

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  39. When I want magic, I take Scholl’s Intensive Anti-callous cream. Even if your feet look like old cheese, about three of four applications have you back to baby’s-bottom. In fact, take care not to overdo, esp. over the tendon… ouch 😉

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  40. They got you good. You should’ve kept right on to the cash register. Now, you’ve got the fuzz all over your house.

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