How the Cookie Crumbles

Life and scribbles on the far side of SIXTY-FIVE

Flash in the Pan – Soldiers

79 Comments


A shoe-box-size package almost tripped him while exiting the front door. The wrapping appeared worn and pre-used. His name and address were scrawled in shaky handwriting. Intrigued, Maximillian dropped his attaché and checked his watch. Ripping the paper, he tipped the tissued innards. Countless soldiers he’d long ago painted with his grandfather tumbled out with a note.

Microsoft Clipart

Microsoft Clipart

Your grandfather is gone. Enjoy with your children. / Grandma Wallace

Tears blinded him, family lineage long-halted by now.

~ * ~

The Winter Quarter of Flash in the Pan is here. The theme: Boys and Their Toys. For the rules and how to join, click: http://mommasmoneymatters.com/flash-fiction/

The word limit for Soldiers is 75 words. I used every last one.

Author: Let's CUT the Crap!

I'm getting a little LONG in the tooth and have things to say about---ouch---AGEing. I believe it's certainly a state of mind but sometimes it's nice to hear that you're NORMAL. I enjoy reading by the truckload. I'm a grandma but I don't feel OLD although I'm not so young anymore. My plan is to stick it out as long as I can on this lovely planet and only will leave it kicking and screaming!

79 thoughts on “Flash in the Pan – Soldiers

  1. Oh Tess, heartbreaking. Firstly that ‘Grandpa’ passed and that he found out through a delivery. In a way though…having something physical to hold – with a memory that he did with him would be comforting. A lovely write – thank you. x

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  2. Tess you have the ability to convey such a powerful story in so few words. i really enjoyed it!

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  3. Amazing. You got a whole story into that short of a space, and I actually cared about the characters.

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  4. What a way to find out… Really creates an emotional heartbreaking draw. Great writing, Tess!

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  5. Beautifully said!!

    We live our life in moments – memories are all that we have of those that have gone before. May we use every moment wisely.

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  6. We all have those things that bring back the good things about our childhood. Great post!

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  7. What a poignant thought.

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  8. You really write so well, Tess!

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  9. Nice story that most people will be able to relate to. Recently I came across some plastic soldiers that had been thrown away, they were just lying on the pavement so I rescued them. They were bandsmen and one was free in every packet of Kellog’s Corn Flakes (this was a long time ago) and I used to collect them with my dad.

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    • Thanks for your story, Andrew. I don’t know where my stories come from as I have no experience with ‘boys’ toys’ and had no brothers. Way back, I do recall when I was young somebody’s son had green plastic soldiers. 😀

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  10. Great piece as usual. So much in so little.

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  11. This is brilliant Tess 🙂

    Andro xxxx

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  12. You would be really good at writing abstracts for psychology journals. Abstracts are summaries of the article and the standards for writing them are pretty rigorous.

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    • Gee, thanks, Karen. I DO tend to like compact writing. Even book reviews I’ve written aren’t long. Usually I feel tongue-tied but in fact feel I’ve said what I’ve wanted to say about a book.
      😀

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  13. I love the nostalgia you evoked. You also left me wondering if Maximillian had any children with which to enjoy the soldiers, and if so, why didn’t Grandma seem to know that?

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  14. A touching, evocative story, Tess. Well done!

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  15. oh no. I feel the pain, but it’s good to have the soldiers and memories.

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  16. Your flash made me think of my own grandfather. The name of your character is one I haven’t seen in a long time, almost unique. Well done, Tess.

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  17. Oh my this is heart wrenching Tess, and very, very imaginative.

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  18. Tess – I love how you use every single word to create the most magnificent stories.

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  19. Congrats to you Tess. Your writings, although in short flash, are always full of grand prose. 🙂

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  20. I am happy to read it. Have a beautiful day 🙂

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  21. Oh Tess, what a stunningly moving story. Again, I just don’t know how you do it in so few words. This brought a tear to my eye. Very, very powerful and hauntingly beautiful.

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  22. I sighed out loud when I read this one. “whew”.

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  23. This was perfect, I love this one Tess.

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  24. Sad, but delicately done. I like the shoebox association. Somehow tastes of home and childhood; keeping things in shoeboxes, I mean.

    Slight quibble about the first sentence, it’s not the package that is exiting. To save words maybe “as he was leaving” or simply “by the door”?

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